Proverbs 31:10-31

WHAT A LADY

 

I met a lady! What a lady!  She was good looking, pleasant to be around, who laughed at my jokes, and best of all was a Christian.

 

I courted a lady!  What a lady!  She would set aside time to be with me, and would spend time with me just about every evening the first summer we met.

 

I was separated from a lady. What a lady!  She faithfully wrote to me, and prayed for me, while I was in Viet Nam.

 

I married a lady. What a lady!  She bore me three wonderful children, and worked hard to raise them in the Christian faith.

 

I live with a lady!  What a lady!  She has taken the role of a help-meet seriously, and supports me in whatever I do.  And I have never seen a better Pastor’s wife.

 

I love a lady!  What a lady!  Thank you, Dottie, for helping to make the last 34 years of knowing you and almost 32 years of marriage so worthwhile.

 

Notice I didn’t say I married a woman.  I married a lady.  To me, a lady is someone who conducts herself in such a way that reflects all that is good and right and pure in womanhood.  To me, every adult female is a woman, but not every woman is a lady.

 

I have asked you to turn to Proverbs 31:10-32, which is in Hebrew, an acrostic poem, each verse beginning with a different letter of the Hebrew alphabet in Hebrew alphabetical order.

 

Here the lady is called a “virtuous woman”. 

 

A virtuous woman is something every Christian woman should want to be.

A virtuous woman is something every Christian husband should be thankful for if he has one.

A virtuous woman is something every Christian young man should look for, and accept nothing less than when he looks for a wife.

A virtuous woman is something every Christian young lady should want to be and should be trained to be.

 

It can be said of the virtuous woman, “What a lady!”

Let’s consider her qualities from this text.

 

THE LADY’S WORTH - Vss. 10-12

THE LADY’S WORK - Vss. 13-24

THE LADY’S WORDS - Vss. 25-26

THE LADY’S WITNESSES - Vss. 27-31

 

THE LADY’S WORTH - Vss. 10-12

 

Proverbs 31:10 - Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.

 

This does not mean that a virtuous or noble woman is non-existent.  It means that a virtuous woman is rare.  Just as the value of fine jewelry is enhanced by its rarity, the value of a virtuous woman is enhanced because she is a rare find indeed!  

 

Why is a virtuous woman such a rare find?

First of all, to be a Biblical virtuous woman in our day, she must be a Christian woman.

All of us, women and men, are sinners.  We possess an old sinful nature.  That means we all have natural qualities and habits, that is, “sins” make us anything but virtuous.

 

It is the person who has acknowledged their sin and turned to Jesus Christ by faith for forgiveness and salvation that has had their life changed.

 

1 Corinthians 6:9-11 - Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, [10] Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God. [11] And such were some of you: but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God.

 

Becoming a Christian, however, is not a guarantee that a person will be a virtuous woman.  Finding a virtuous woman is hard because the woman who would be a virtuous woman must be a surrendered, practicing disciple of Jesus Christ!   

 

John 13:13 - Ye call me Master and Lord: and ye say well; for so I am.

 

Luke 9:23 - And he said to them all, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me.

 

Romans 12:1 - I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service.

 

It is the Christian woman who is yielded to Christ’s Lordship, and controlled by the Holy Spirit that will be virtuous.

 

Ephesians 5:9 - (For the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness and righteousness and truth;)

 

So finding a virtuous woman is hard because they are rare.

And by being rare and having rare intrinsic beauty, virtuous women are valuable.

   

Proverbs 31:11 - The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.

   

A virtuous woman is rare because she can be trusted by her husband.   

·        She can be trusted to be honest and loyal.

·        She be trusted to speak well of and to him.

·        She can be trusted to be supportive of him.

·        She can be trusted to be submissive to His leadership.

 

Husbands are to provide there wives with loving, considerate, benevolent, leadership.  Wives are to lovingly submit to that leadership.  The husband is not a dictator, but he is to be the leader.

Ephesians 5:21-25 - Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. [22] Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. [23] For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. [24] Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. [25] Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

 

The virtuous woman is so valuable, that the husband has no need of “spoil”.  Spoil was the riches gained from plundering the wealth of a conquered foe.

 

A loving, caring, loyal wife is more valuable than all the spoil and yes, all the riches in the world.   

 

Proverbs 31:12 - She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

 

·        Some wives publicly criticize their husbands.

·        Some wives run up needless bills.

·        Some wives break their husbands’ hearts by being unfaithful.

·        Some wives alienate the children against their fathers.

·        Some wives break their husbands’ hearts by being unfaithful.

·        Some wives are rebellious.

 

But virtuous women are different. They do what is good for their husbands.

·        They talk quietly to God about their husbands faults, and if necessary, deal with them quietly.

·        They say and do supportive things in behalf of their husbands.

·        They are careful about their spending habits.

·        They are one man women.

·        They are supportive of their husband’s leadership in the family.

·        They stick with the husband even if he becomes ill.

   

As you can see, a virtuous woman is very special, and rare indeed!  Be thankful if you are one.  Be thankful if you are married to one.  Be striving to be one. 

 

And men, if we have virtuous woman for wives, let’s make sure that we lead them and love them as Ephesians 5 teaches.  And lets also practice 1 Peter 3:7: Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.

 

THE LADY’S WORTH - Vss. 10-12

THE LADY’S WORK - Vss. 13-24

 

There is no doubt that this lady was very industrious.

It is almost impossible to read this section and not get tired or depressed!

When this woman slept, who knows?

 

I honestly think that this is a summary of a lifetime of work.

I don’t think that this dear lady necessarily did all these things at once.

Also, it is obvious that this lady and her husband were people of means.  Not all of us are.  What are some of the practical lessons we learn about her work here?

   

Vs. 13 – She worked willingly with her hands.  She would

               have made things for her family with the wool and

               flax.

               Not every woman has the same practical skills.

               But whatever skills we have can be used to help the

               family.

               Fran and Ronna and others do mowing.

               Some of you bake.

               Still others are able to type and help with

               secretarial work.

               Brenda can do some plumbing.

 

Vs. 14 – This is the verse that some of you ladies have been

               looking for!

               This is the verse that says shopping is Biblical!

               She evidently liked to shop!

              This woman just became somebody’s heroine!

              We see that she did what she had to do to meet the

              needs of her family. That’s why she shopped.

 

Shopping is something that has to be done. Praise the Lord for women who can take advantage of real bargains when they see them.

 

Vs. 15 – Perhaps she was up early packing lunches for those in the family who worked in the fields.  But whatever the reason, she took responsibility to see that the family was fed.

 

With many of you working outside of the home, it is a challenge to have proper meals, but it is something that needs attention.

 

When I was in High School, I worked after school until 6:00.  My brother went to work around 5:00, and my father got home about 5:30.  Mom saw that each of us got a hot meal at the time we could eat it.  And when I was working one summer at a food store, many nights my Mom or Dad with bring my supper up to the store at whatever hour I was scheduled to eat.

It’s a challenge to feed a family, but blessed are you Moms who go out of your way to do so! Some of you get up early to fix breakfast and/or pack a lunch. The Lord bless you!

 

Vs. 17-19, 24 – This lady was not afraid to do what she could to help with the family income. 

 

Vs. 20 – This lady had resources and was not afraid to use them to help others.  This is something we can learn from this lady.  The Bible is very clear that we should those in need.

 

Proverbs 19:17 - He that hath pity upon the poor lendeth unto the Lord; and that which he hath given will he pay him again.

 

1 John 3:17 - But whoso hath this world's good, and seeth his brother have need, and shutteth up his bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him?

 

During the depression many a lady gave handouts to needy tramps.

 

My mother in-law always had her eye open to help someone in need. One year her and my father in-law even paid tuition so a child could go to Christian school.  

   

Ladies you can’t meet everyone’s needs but you can probably help with someone’s needs.

 

Vss. 21-22 – She made sure that she and her family were well clothed.

 

Vs. 23 – Her husband was a leader in the community.  The city gates was where government was carried out.  Perhaps because of this lady’s wise household management, the husband was able to do other things with his time for the good of the community.

 

Many a wife has freed up her husband, taking care of things at home and ever for his business, so the husband was free to be a blessing in other ways.

H.A. Ironside was a great evangelist and itinerant Bible Teacher.  He was able to do this because his wife, Helen, stand home and ran the home and raised their children.

 

Now the last thing I’m trying to do is lay a guilt trip on any of you.  I know that many of you do many things to help keep your family going and that’s good!  If you are doing the best you can to glorify God by working hard with your husband and for your family that’s good.  But there’s more.

 

THE LADY’S WORTH - Vss. 10-12

THE LADY’S WORK - Vss. 13-24

THE LADY’S WORDS - Vss. 25-26

 

Proverbs 31:25-26 - Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come. [26] She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

This was a strong dignified, woman.

She was the type of person who laughed or smiled at the future.

She wasn’t haughty, but I think she could smile at the future for two reasons.  First, she was prepared.  She had done all she could.  But secondly, and more importantly, according to verse 30, she was a God-fearing woman.

Therefore her confidence was in God and not in her own ability.

 

This is the most important aspect of being a virtuous woman. 

A virtuous woman is a woman who cares what God thinks.

A virtuous woman is a woman who wants to please God above all.

I digress for a moment to say to you, that there are not enough Christian woman that fear God today.  And there are not enough Christian men who fear God today.

Yes, when we fear God we will reverence Him.

Yes, when we fear God we will respect Him.

And yes, God loves us, and when we come to God through Christ, we will bask in that love.

But let’s not get so comfy with God that we really don’t care what he thinks!

 

Isaiah 8:13 - Sanctify the Lord of hosts himself; and let him be your fear, and let him be your dread.

 

All too often we fear man, but we don’t fear God!

If we fear God, we won’t fear man!

Luke 12:4-5 - And I say unto you my friends, Be not afraid of them that kill the body, and after that have no more that they can do. [5] But I will forewarn you whom ye shall fear: Fear him, which after he hath killed hath power to cast into hell; yea, I say unto you, Fear him.  Are not five sparrows sold for two farthings, and not one of them is forgotten before God? [7] But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not therefore: ye are of more value than many sparrows.

 

The virtuous woman feared God.

 

Vs. 26 – This virtuous woman had a tongue that led people to God.

This is a woman who would have practiced control of the tongue.

 

Proverbs 15:1 - A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.

 

Proverbs 15:4 - A wholesome tongue is a tree of life: but perverseness therein is a breach in the spirit.

 

And her wisdom would have taught her children from birth through adulthood.   

 

Proverbs 22:6 - Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

 

It is the duty of the husband and the wife to train the children to love and serve the Lord!   

 

THE LADY’S WORTH - Vss. 10-12

THE LADY’S WORK - Vss. 13-24

THE LADY’S WORDS - Vss. 25-26

THE LADY’S WITNESSES - Vss. 27-31

 

Proverbs 31:28 - Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

 

Proverbs 31:30-31 - Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised. [31] Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.

 

The virtuous woman has three witnesses to her Godliness.

First of all, her children, who were well raised and well taken care of for so many years will rise up and call her blessed!

 

She will also have the praise of her husband.

And she will have praise in the community, at the gates.   

 

Do you or did you have a godly mother?

Be her witness both to others and to her.

Give her the praise that she deserves.

 

Do you have a Godly wife who is a Godly mother?

Give her the praise that she deserves, both to her and in front of others. Today would be a good day to thank her.

 

And remember, for the Christian virtuous woman, there is reward yet to come, when Jesus can say to her, “Well done thou good and faithful servant.”   

 

The Virtuous woman, what a lady!   

 

THE LADY’S WORTH - Vss. 10-12

THE LADY’S WORK - Vss. 13-24

THE LADY’S WORDS - Vss. 25-26

THE LADY’S WITNESSES - Vss. 27-31

   

Thank God for the virtuous women that we know.