PROVERBS 27:5-6, 9,10,17
THAT'S FRIENDSHIP
Two
(friends) were out hunting in the northern U.S. Suddenly one yelled and the
other looked up to see a grizzly charging them.
The
first started to frantically put on his tennis shoes and his friend anxiously
asked, “What are you doing? Don’t you know you can’t outrun a grizzly bear?”
“I
don’t have to outrun a grizzly. I just have to outrun you!”(BSF)
On
one occasion, Peppermint Patty said to Marcie: “I’d like to read this book,
Marcie, but I’m kind of afraid. I had a grandfather who didn’t think much of
reading.” She continued by saying, “He always said that if you read too many
books, your head would fall off.”
Marcie
responds, “you start the first chapter, and I’ll hold
onto your head!” (BSF)
As
he walked to the long-jump pit, however, Owens saw a tall, blue eyed, blond
German taking practice jumps in the 26-foot range. Owens felt nervous. He was
acutely aware of the Nazis’ desire to prove “Aryan superiority,” especially
over blacks.
At
this point, the tall German introduced himself as Luz Long. “You should be able
to qualify with your eyes closed!” he said to Owens, referring to his two
jumps.
For
the next few moments the black son of a sharecropper and the white model of
Nazi manhood chatted. Then Long made a suggestion. Since
the qualifying distance was only 23 feet, 5 1/2 inches, why not make a mark
several inches before the takeoff board and jump from there, just to play it
safe? Owens did and qualified easily.
In
the finals Owens set an Olympic record and earned the second of four golds. The first person to congratulate him was Luz Long—in
full view of Adolf Hitler.
Owens
never again saw Long, who was killed in World War II. “You could melt down all
the medals and cups I have,” Owens later wrote, “and they wouldn’t be a
platting on the 24-carat friendship I felt for Luz Long.” Source Unknown
Our
subject tonight is friendship, based on verses found in Proverbs 27. The testimonies that we shared earlier remind
us of how important it is, and what an honor it is to have good friends.
THE COUNCIL OF A FRIEND - Vss. 5-6, 9
THE CONSISTENCY OF A FRIEND - Vs. 10A
THE COMFORT OF A FRIEND - Vs. 10B
THE COMPETENCE OF A FRIEND - Vs. 17
THE COUNCIL OF A FRIEND - Vss. 5-6, 9
ODB - "What would you think of a doctor who
withheld critical information from his patients because he didn't like to give
them bad news? Imagine going to such a doctor. The examination is fairly routine, but the doctor says he would like to run some
tests.
The
lab work identifies you problem as life-threatening, but curable if treated
immediately.
"Now
imagine this: with lab work in hand and an understanding of the serious nature
of your condition, the physician assures you that you are fine.
"Several
months later, you are sitting in another doctor's office. This time, you hear
the shocking news that you have only 6 months to live, and that if your disease
had been detected earlier you could have been cured."
Aren't
you glad when you have doctors who tell you the truth?
Better
to know the truth and deal with it, than to have the truth shielded from you.
Vs.
5 - Open
rebuke is better than secret love.
The word "secret" here
means withdrawn.
It
is better to tell a friend the truth then to keep quiet. When you are quiet, it
means that your true love for that friend has been withdrawn.
Vs.
6 - Wounds
from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses. NIV
When
a friend chooses to "wound" you, the friend can be trusted.
He's
faithful!
Wounds
of a friend are faithful because the person is seeking your good!
An
enemy however, like a Judas, can shower you with kisses and with flattery, just
for the purpose of deceiving you.
We
show our love for our friends when we care to confront.
There
once was a college student named Frank.
Frank
literally stunk! And the other guys in
the dorm made fun of him
behind his back.
One
day, one of Frank's friends took Frank aside and kindly told him that he had a B.O. problem. Frank explained that the problem was his
feet. But from that moment on, I don't think there was ever a problem again.
Frank
suffered a "wound" from his friend, but that friend was best man in
his wedding. And every year Frank and Carol go to visit that friend and his
wife at Christmastime. This summer Frank and I will be riding roller coasters
together. You can guess who the friend is.
There
is a way to approach a friend when he or she needs a rebuke. The approach is
always to be in love. It needs to be
honest and sometimes brutal. However, we
need to remember that we should always be tactful in the way we say things.
Galatians
6:1 - Brethren,
if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest
thou also be tempted. - COMMENT
Verse
9 - Often
our friends are not in need of a rebuke, but just some advice or counsel. We are showing our friendship when we are
willing to give that counsel.
Just
as ointment or perfume bring joy, so does hearty
counsel from a friend.
And
let me remind you of a key part to any counseling.
We
need to be good listeners!
Chuck
Swindoll once found himself with too many commitments in too few days. He got
nervous and tense about it.
“I
was snapping at my wife and our children, choking down my food at mealtimes,
and feeling irritated at those unexpected interruptions through the day,” he
recalled in his book Stress Fractures.
“Before
long, things around our home started reflecting the pattern of my hurry-up
style. It was becoming unbearable.
“I
distinctly remember after supper one evening, the words of our younger
daughter, Colleen. She wanted to tell me something important that had happened
to her at school that day. She began hurriedly, ‘Daddy, I wanna
tell you somethin’ and I’ll tell you really fast.’
“Suddenly
realizing her frustration, I answered, ‘Honey, you can tell me—and you don’t
have to tell me really fast. Say it slowly.”
“I’ll never forget her answer: ‘Then listen
slowly.’”
Isn't
that what our friends need? Someone who will simply
"listen slowly" and then speak. I find that the biggest part
of counseling is listening. If we love
our friends and family, let's take time to listen.
James
1:19-20 - Wherefore,
my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to
wrath: For the wrath of man worketh not the
righteousness of God.
Another
part of hearty council, especially for Christian friends, is sharing the Word
of God.
Proverbs
25:11 - A
word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver.
As
we aptly share the Word of God, we can be assured of sharing the very best God
has for that person.
2
Timothy 3:16
- All
scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for
reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:
We
often think of reading the Word of God for our own benefit, and we should read
it every day. But I have found that when
I read and meditate on God's Word, I often have just the thing to share with
someone else! We don't need to preach at
people, but quietly share what God has shared with us. But if you're not in the Word, you'll have nothing
to share!
THE COUNCIL OF A FRIEND - Vss. 5-6, 9
THE CONSISTENCY OF A FRIEND - Vs. 10A
Proverbs
27:10 - Thine
own friend, and thy father's friend, forsake not;
We
have such busy life styles today.
Everybody has places to go and things to do. We probably all have friends that we should
contact, but have not! The best thing we
could all do this week is pick a friend or a friend of your parent's and get in
touch!
God
puts such a value on friendship! It is
as if God is saying if a person was kind enough to be your dad's friend, he's
good enough to be your friend!
1
Kings 5:1-7
- Solomon continued friendship with his father's friends.
1
Kings 12:6-8
- And king Rehoboam
consulted with the old men, that stood before Solomon his father while he yet
lived, and said, How do ye advise that I may answer
this people? And they spake unto him, saying, If thou wilt be a servant unto
this people this day, and wilt serve them, and answer them, and speak good
words to them, then they will be thy servants for ever. But he forsook the
counsel of the old men, which they had given him, and consulted with the young
men that were grown up with him, and which stood before him:
Solomon's
Son forsook the counsel of his father's friends. His kingdom split.
I
grew up knowing "Aunt Ruth" and "Uncle Dick". Aunt Ruth is
actually a childhood friend of my mother's who is my godmother.
Uncle
Dick, her husband, has been my father's friend for years, worked with him for
several years, and was active with my Dad in the Gideons.
I
consider Aunt Ruth and Uncle Dick friends.
We don't see them very often, but they keep in touch with me and I with them. I believe they prayed for my salvation before I
came to know the Lord.
Perhaps
there's an "Aunt Ruth" or an "Uncle Dick" in your life.
Maybe you haven't been in touch for a while. Get in touch!
I
was thinking. With our busy schedules, how do we make time for friends?
One
thing we can do is make a list of people with whom we need to keep track, and
then once a week, contact someone on that list.
Have
you noticed that even here in church we really don't socialize with each other
as much as we should? That's how friendships grow.
THE COUNCIL OF A FRIEND - Vss. 5-6, 9
THE CONSISTENCY OF A FRIEND - Vs. 10A
THE COMFORT OF A FRIEND - Vs. 10B
Perhaps
we are being told here that calamity is not the only time to visit our
families. Sometimes the only time we see people is at funerals! If we have not been in touch with our
families, then a friend is a bigger help.
Believe
me, during a tragedy, I'd greatly appreciate your comfort more that than that
of some of my relatives!
Proverbs
18:24 - A man
that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and
there is a friend that sticketh closer than a
brother.
When
we think of the friend that "sticketh closer that
a brother" who do we think of? We think of the Lord Jesus!
Think
for a moment of what Jesus told us in John 13:34-35.
John
13:34-35 - A new
commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you,
that ye also love one another. By this shall all men know that ye are my
disciples, if ye have love one to another.
If
we are going to do as Jesus has commanded us, we need
to love as Jesus loved. We need to stick closer than a brother!
That
leads us to another verse in Proverbs.
Proverbs
17:17 - A friend loveth at all times, and a brother
is born for adversity.
Adversity
does bring families together.
A
brother who is close is invaluable during adversity. I have two brothers. One I saw yesterday. Although one brother would be there during
adversity, the bigger comfort would be my other brother. Art is my brother in two ways. He's a brother
in the flesh and a brother in the Lord.
I
would also suggest to you that a friend who loves at all times is a brother, is
a sister! The friend who loves at all
times will be there for you during adversity.
One
could not but be moved by the story of the soldier who asked his officer if he
might go out into the "No Man's Land" between the trenches in World
War I to bring in one of his comrades who lay grievously wounded.
"You
can go," said the officer, "but it's not worth it. Your friend is
probably killed, and you will throw your own life away." But the man went.
Somehow he managed to get to his friend, hoist him onto his shoulder, and bring
him back to the trenches.
The
two of them tumbled in together and lay in the trench bottom. The officer
looked very tenderly on the would-be rescuer, and then he said, "I told
you it wouldn't be worth it. Your friend is dead and you are mortally
wounded."
"It
was worth it, though, sir," he said. "How do you mean, 'worth it'? I
tell you your friend is dead."
"Yes,
sir," the boy answered, "but it was worth it, because when I got to
him he was still alive, and he said to me, 'Jim, I knew you'd come.'" James S.
Hewett, Illustrations Unlimited (Wheaton: Tyndale
House Publishers, Inc, 1988) p. 226.
Let
us take to heart a couple of verses from the Apostle Paul.
Romans
12:15 - Rejoice
with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep.
Galatians
6:2 - Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil
the law of Christ.
THE COUNCIL OF A FRIEND - Vss. 5-6, 9
THE CONSISTENCY OF A FRIEND - Vs. 10A
THE COMFORT OF A FRIEND - Vs. 10B
THE COMPETENCE OF A FRIEND - Vs. 17
BKC - "When iron is rubbed
against another piece of iron it shapes and sharpens it. Similarly people can
help each other improve by their discussions, criticisms, suggestions, and
ideas." (Page 964)
In
a good friendship, each person helps the other become a better person. In a
good Christian friendship each Christian helps the other become a better
Christian.
One
of the more famous friendships in the Bible was between David and Jonathan.
What made that friendship all the more remarkable was the fact that Jonathan,
humanly speaking, was heir to
Jonathan
knew that David would be the next king, because God was removing kingship from
Saul and his family. There was not jealousy, and Jonathan always tried to do
his best for David. I am sure that
friendship with David sharpened Jonathan.
We know that friendship with Jonathan sharpened David.
1
Samuel 23:16
- And
Jonathan Saul's son arose, and went to David into the wood, and strengthened
his hand in God.
2
Samuel 1:25-26
- How
are the mighty fallen in the midst of the battle! O Jonathan, thou was slain in
thine high places. I am distressed for thee, my brother Jonathan: very pleasant
hast thou been unto me: thy love to me was wonderful, passing the love of
women.
Another
example of "iron sharpening iron" is found in the life of the Apostle
Paul. As you know, Paul was the mentor
to several young men, including Timothy and Titus. We think of Paul sharpening
them, but they also sharpened him.
2
Corinthians 7:5-6 - For, when we were come into
So
what's the point for you and me? Let us seek to be friends who sharpen our
friends. And let us allow our friends to sharpen us.
Talk
with your friends. Pick their brains.
Watch
for their positive examples and imitate them.
And
remember, it is our job to be encourage our friends
and to be encouraged by them!
Hebrews
3:12-13 - Take
heed, brethren, lest there be in any of you an evil heart of unbelief, in
departing from the living God. But exhort one another daily, while it is called
To day; lest any of you be hardened through the
deceitfulness of sin.
Hebrews
10:24-25 - And
let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works: Not
forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but
exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching.
This
week, let us strive to be good friends.
Let's
remember from Proverbs 27:
THE COUNCIL OF A FRIEND - Vss. 5-6, 9
THE CONSISTENCY OF A FRIEND - Vs. 10A
THE COMFORT OF A FRIEND - Vs. 10B
THE COMPETENCE OF A FRIEND - Vs. 17